ADHD, DUI, Depression, Insomnia, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, PTSD

A note to the sleepless…

You’re tired, but you can't sleep. Your head won't calm down, and you shoulders won't ease up. You grind your teeth and repeat over and over “just fall asleep” but it isn’t working like it used to. You wonder what time it is now, illuminating the screen on your phone, knowing that’s not going to… Continue reading A note to the sleepless…

ADHD, DUI, Jail

Booking and my first night in Jail

I got up early, I was supposed to report at noon to the jail to surrender myself. I drank the last beer in the fridge, because I knew it would be my last until after 2 years of probation were completed. I take a colonopin to settle my nerves, I’m on the verge of tears… Continue reading Booking and my first night in Jail

ADHD, DUI, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, Sentenced to Jail

The Sentencing

"I understood myself, only after i destroyed myself, and only in the process of fixing myself, did I know who I really was" -Sade Andria Zavala It was a 9 am appointment time for my sentencing hearing. I was wearing business attire, a white shirt and blazer, and low wedge heels. I wore my hair… Continue reading The Sentencing

ADHD, DUI, Panic Attacks, Anxiety

An Avalanche of Anxiety

My first debilitating panic attack I encountered was when I was in college. I had a friend who was pregnant but somehow kept it a secret from our close circle of friends, she was in serious denial about her situation and didn’t tell me until she was 7 months in, and was having some issues.… Continue reading An Avalanche of Anxiety

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Mandatory Guilt

I received a call from the attorney the next day, it was brief, very direct, and expensive. I told them the information that they asked for, and received a dialogue of what my next steps were, what to expect in the process and what I should start doing right away. I liked hearing that there… Continue reading Mandatory Guilt

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Grow Through What You Go Through

The next few days were a struggle, I wasn't sure what the exact consequences were of my actions the previous night, but I was learning from various online searches what I really got myself into. The legal limits and consequences for my county. I knew i was screwed. I threw up. I dug and dug… Continue reading Grow Through What You Go Through