ADHD, DUI, Depression, emotions, Family, Guilt, Insomnia, Jail, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, PTSD, recovery, Sentenced to Jail, Therapy, Vulnerability

The Cost of a DUI

In exactly two weeks I will be enjoying my first joint, in two years.... while I ponder that moment, let me do some reflecting on the cost of a DUI- financially and personally. I will be free of the "system", the system that prides it's self on justice. I committed a crime, yes, a terrible… Continue reading The Cost of a DUI

ADHD, DUI, Depression, Guilt, Jail, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, PTSD, recovery, Sentenced to Jail, Therapy, Vulnerability

Reflections of probation –

My long two years of probation are coming to an end in 25 todays In my Brain I worried, that if something happens and the un-just justice system pulls me back in for a small technicality, like a diluted test.. will it ever end? My heart, is so tired of this fight- I have given… Continue reading Reflections of probation –

ADHD, Depression, emotions, Feel and let feel, intamacy, Let People in, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, PTSD, rape, recovery, Selfcare, SOS, Therapy, Vulnerability

Intimacy

I haven't had sex in two years. I decided after getting my DUI and breaking up with my rebound-boyfriend, that I was going to take the next two years and dedicate them to myself. I was placed on probation for two years, so two years of sobriety and abstinence sounded like a good duo. Now… Continue reading Intimacy

Depression, emotions, Guilt, Jail, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, projections, PTSD, recovery, Selfcare, Sentenced to Jail

The cage

A journey I wandered upon myself entombed in iron caging and glass walls on all sides Bars built to hold a wild animal- a container with no privacy or escape I looked through the bars at the "me" stuck inside A desperate, desolate, distant version of myself All the color and light her eyes had… Continue reading The cage

ADHD, DUI, Depression, Insomnia, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, PTSD

A note to the sleepless…

You’re tired, but you can't sleep. Your head won't calm down, and you shoulders won't ease up. You grind your teeth and repeat over and over “just fall asleep” but it isn’t working like it used to. You wonder what time it is now, illuminating the screen on your phone, knowing that’s not going to… Continue reading A note to the sleepless…

Depression, emotions, Guilt, Letter to my guilt, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, projections, PTSD, recovery, Therapy

A letter to my Parents

I was asked to write a letter to my parents, so that I could express my emotions fully to them. My therapist and I had scheduled a session so that I could ask them how they felt when I was arrested, put in Jail for 10 days, and dealing with my DUI in general. I… Continue reading A letter to my Parents